After a calm pregnancy with little discomfort, I lived the last few days with a bit of nerves. The due date had already passed and the obstetrician wanted to schedule an induction for us. I asked her to delay it as long as possible and she suggested waiting until the day I reached 42 weeks, since everything was fine.

On Sunday night Marga made us a visit to talk us through all the options we had; we decided to do acupuncture, massage and the Hamilton manoeuvre. For days I’d been feeling contractions, but very faint and irregular. On Monday morning I started to feel them more often. After lunch I wanted to take a nap to try to rest in case things picked up, but I couldn’t sleep. I suppose it was a mix of nerves, excitement and the odd more intense contraction. As the afternoon went on the contractions had become regular, but very spaced out. Throughout the process we kept in touch with Marga and Sílvia.

Each hour the time between contractions grew shorter. At first I got through them while walking, but later towards the evening everything intensified. Àlex warmed the hot water bottle and the seed bag for me while giving me massages. I kept walking from the living room to the bedroom and buried my face in the cushions, I don’t know why, while the moment of greatest intensity passed. I remember that between contractions a great drowsiness would come over me.

I don’t remember what time it was, I’d already lost track of time, the contractions were very close together and intense. I felt that what I was doing was no longer enough to move through the pain and I told Àlex I was going to the shower. Meanwhile he called Marga to ask her to come and to tell her he’d start filling the pool.

Around 1 in the morning Marga arrived (I don’t know why I remember the time). Minutes before she arrived I’d started to feel the urge to push. I’d also felt a warm liquid coming out and deduced that my waters had broken.

Marga asked my permission to examine me and told us I’d dilated to about 6-7cm. She also listened to Aran’s heart, which was beating and changing its rhythm with each contraction. Outside my birth world, at home, the fuses had blown from the strain on the water heater as it filled the bathtub. Honestly I didn’t mind at all since I wasn’t cold, but Marga and Àlex kept heating pots and kettles.

I spent a few hours in the bathtub, with no awareness of the passing of time; I remember that the first time I pushed, an uncontrollable cry came out of me from deep in my guts that surprised me enormously. This whole part was even more wild and animal. Completely surrendered to my body, which did what it knew how to do without needing my will or control. I only connected with my more rational side each time I heard Aran’s heart, because I wanted to feel the reassurance that everything was fine.

After a few hours Marga suggested I change position and proposed getting out to sit on the birthing chair. In all this intense and overwhelming time I didn’t let Àlex move from my side, and in silence he massaged my lower back. I also felt Marga’s hand and, most importantly, her calm and experience.

I stayed on the birthing chair a while longer, Àlex sat behind me on an ordinary chair and took my weight each time I lifted myself to bear down. I was tired from the effort; between each contraction Marga encouraged me to breathe calmly. Sílvia, the second midwife, appeared discreetly and smiling. She began to prepare some things for the end of the birth and listened to Aran’s heart, which adjusted and picked back up with each contraction.

We were at the end now, they told me there was little left, they could already see the head close. I said I couldn’t take any more, I felt exhausted, and they began to encourage me with great strength and energy.

The head was out. They told me that with the next contraction he would be born; while Marga was ready to receive him, Sílvia placed compresses to protect my perineum and Àlex stayed behind me helping me bear down. I felt the urge to push return and I let out all the strength I had left. At 5.02 in the morning on Tuesday 9 November 2021 Aran was born. Marga took him, eased off the cord that was looped across him like a sash and in a few seconds I had him in my arms. She quickly rubbed him and covered him with the warm towel and he began to cry. I remember asking them if he was okay, I had the need to know that everything had gone well and when they assured me, I breathed easy. I also remember Àlex holding my arms because he didn’t want Aran to slip. And many kisses, so much emotion.

I remember an embrace between Marga and Sílvia and their smiles.

I lost a little blood and they quickly walked me to the sofa where I lay down, I delivered the placenta and my birth was over. While they continued the care and checked in detail that we were both well, I was still on a cloud. Love at first sight. They worked discreetly to give the three of us our moment of intimacy, of the birth of a new family, of reunion on the other side of the skin.

Aran was no longer crying and began to move his head to feed; Sílvia helped him do it, he didn’t suckle very strongly, but it was a magical moment, what a special feeling. The energy and happiness overflowed in me. We chatted, ate something, the smell of coffee, we shared the joy with family and friends, they tidied up, everything so natural, so easy, with such closeness, as a family. Outside, day was breaking. Sílvia left and when everything was in order, a couple of hours later, Marga left.

Àlex made me lunch and we went to bed. I couldn’t sleep, oxytocin was running through my veins. My tired body didn’t keep up with my euphoria. I could only think of the happiness I felt.

And now I get emotional just remembering it. I feel nothing but infinite gratitude for the two women who accompanied me before, during and after, with a respect, a trust and a love that were spectacular. I feel absolute happiness knowing there’s no better or more special person to build a family with than Àlex. And I feel proud for having empowered myself and having allowed myself to follow my instinct, which have led me to have this incredible experience.

Now I know unconditional love thanks to Aran.